By The Secret Traveller
Staying in a dorm room? Here’s how to really annoy the people you’re sharing that small, intimate space with.
This is an extremely small space that you’re sharing with probably five or six other people. So when you open up your backpack and start spreading clothes and cords and toiletries all around the place, people are going to get annoyed. Try to keep everything contained.
It’s only when you spend a bit of time staying in dorm rooms that you realise just how many people out there snore. There’s usually at least one snorer per room, each with a unique volume level that ranges between “loud” and “nuclear warfare” and that you’ll never be able to ignore. The only way to avoid this is to pack earplugs.
Dude. I don’t care what the culture is like in Germany, or Finland, or wherever you’re from that makes you think it’s OK to wander around the dorm room buck naked. I don’t want to see your junk, and no one else wants to see your junk. Wrap a towel around it at the very least.
It’s your holiday and you can do what you want, but if you’re going to repeatedly get back to the hostel blind drunk at four in the morning and turn on the lights while you try to figure out which one is your bed, you’re going to annoy people.
Sure, you have an iPhone to charge, and probably an iPad, and maybe a camera battery and possibly even a laptop. But so does everyone else. It’s extremely bad form to plug all of your adapters in and leave no space for anyone else. Bring a powerboard if you have that many things to charge.
Here’s a tip for first-time players: even discreet whispers sound like someone yelling in your ear when it’s three in the morning and the lights are out. Once it gets past midnight or so, you really shouldn’t be talking in a dorm room.
Plastic bags must be about the loudest, most annoying things a person can possibly back in their bag. The rustle of a plastic bag, or even something like a chip packet, is almost impossible to sleep through, especially if it goes on for a while as someone digs around in their pack looking for that one little thing they just can’t find.
There’s nothing worse than heading back to your dorm room around mid-afternoon with a few mates, ready to sort out all of your clothes, chat, hang out, relax… Only to find someone is trying to sleep in there at the same time. It makes it uncomfortable for everyone. Just get up.
In pretty much every dorm room around the world there is at least one stinky guy who’s obviously decided that he’s on holidays and is no longer required to bathe. It’s pretty gross. And if you can’t figure out who that guy is, then it’s probably you.
Top-bunk occupiers: please don’t hang your wet towel on your bunk so that it drapes down over the bottom bunk. Whoever is down there does not want to smell your musty stink while they’re trying to relax.
Dorm rooms are social places. You’re supposed to make friends. You’re supposed to meet people from all parts of the world and all walks of life. This is not a place to go quiet and not talk to anyone. Get into the spirit of a hostel and you’ll be rewarded.
Have a fun, safe & enjoyable holiday with our guide to staying safe in Bali.
1Cover’s UK Survival Guide is packed full handy hints, tips and tricks from those in the know.